Chapter 27: Kelsey

All I could do was stare at her as she held the door open, clutching her belly and the doorknob I’d purchased at an antique shop in Seattle. She had beautiful brown eyes, but she wasn’t beautiful. Yeah, she was pretty. She wasn’t beautiful, though, you know what I mean? She was just… normal? Average? Her huge smile suggested that she was genuinely pleased that I was here. There is no reason she should be excited to see me. No reason at all. Something is off. Why would Alex leave when he knew I’d be coming by? 

“Well, don’t just stand there, silly girl! Come on inside!” she said, still sounding happy and welcoming. Her smile was the kind of smile that would have been contagious if I wasn’t in a temporary form of shock. I kept waiting for TruPaul to pop out from behind her and say, “Gotcha, bitch!”

“Alex really should be back any time now,” she continued. “Oh, I’m Penelope by the way, but I’m sure you already know that! I know Alex has told you all about me and the little one. He’s told me all about you, too! I feel like I know you, honestly. I hope that doesn’t sound weird. By the way, you really are beautiful, Stella” she said.

Silence.
What. The. Fuck. Is. Going. On. Why does this feel more like a dream than my dream did? This can’t be real life. She did not just say those things to me. She is not happy to see me. Why would she be happy to see me? She's treating me like I’m her long lost best friend or something. Speak, Stella. Say something! Say anything. She’s talking to you, and you’re just staring at her like some deranged psycho.

More silence.
Attention, voice!  You must speak. You are making this introduction so awkward for this poor woman, who is obviously clueless about who you really are. Maybe Alex knows two Stella's and she's mistaken me for the other one. Yeah, maybe that's it. But... I mean, at least she’s being nice. At least Alex hasn’t been bad mouthing you to his new babymama. You have to say something! My mouth simply wasn’t ready respond to what my brain was telling it, though. It just hung there, half open, with no intent of ever moving.

Penelope had a slightly confused look on her face, but was still wearing her big, warm smile as she looked at me with concern. She feels like she knows me? What the hell is going on here?

I decided to try to give my best effort at a smile since there was obviously no hope for conversation. Smile, Stella. Go on, smile. My efforts must have been sufficient because as I was stepping over the threshold and into the foyer Penelope attempted to give me a hug. I’m not a hugger, period. I’m especially not a hugger when it comes to hugging people who took my man, my house, and my future away. She must have sensed that a hug wasn’t acceptable behavior because she withdrew almost immediately and patted me awkwardly on the back.

“You can call me Penny, by the way. Most people do” she said, sounding way too friendly.

The house had a strong smell of new wood and paint, but nothing in my line of vision looked any different. I wonder if—

“Let’s go into the kitchen and I’ll fix you a drink, okay? What would you like?” Penelope said, interrupting my thought.” “Oh wait! Let me show you what we’ve done to your old room first! Yes, come on, come have a look! We’ve just been painting it today. I’m so thrilled with the way the color turned out. Sometimes those swatches aren’t very accurate, you know? Anyway, here it is. We thought it’d make a lovely nursery” Penelope said, answering my unasked question.

I stood there, staring at what used to be one of the two spare bedrooms. Its walls were now a sea foam green color, the ceiling fan had been taken down, and white curtains hung from a new rod. The baby crib was also new. So was the changing table, the white dresser, and the closet full of tiny clothes. Penelope looked at the crib, rubbed her stomach, and said, “I’m just so excited. I’ve always wanted a baby.”

Oh really? Me too, bitch. GYNECOLOGICAL MIRACLE.

“It looks really great” I mumbled, surprised that my voice had decided to come back.

Overly thrilled that I had finally spoken to her, Penelope squealed, hugged me, and said, “It does look great doesn’t it?! Don’t you love it? She’s going to be such a happy baby.”

Great. A bouncing baby girl. I hadn’t heard.

“Yeah, I’m sure she will be. She’s a lucky kid,” I said, not knowing how else to reply.

“I’m so thrilled that you’ll be a part of her life. She will love you,” said Penelope.

WHATWHATWHATWHATWHAT?!?

More silence.

Giving her a blank stare, I nodded and stared at the floor. I feel like this is some sick joke. Be a part of her life—me? Not. Why in the hell would I be a part of her life?

“So, enough about me and the baby! Tell me all about your life!” Penelope urged. “I heard you recently went to New York City on vacay, right? Alex said that was why you couldn’t come to the shower last week. How was it? Did you shop? I saw your shoe collection girl, and it is the most fabulous thing I’ve ever seen. Don’t worry, I didn’t wear any, I swear! My feet are too swollen,” Penelope said, chuckling and starting down at her admittedly huge feet.

Okay. Enough. This is enough. I should just leave right now. Alex has obviously, VERY OBVIOUSLY, been lying to this woman about who I am. I should have left as soon as Penelope said he wasn’t here. I mean, why would he leave? He knew I was coming! Was this why? Did he need me to realize that Penelope has absolutely no idea that he and I were a couple? Because the girl has no clue. No clue. Or, if she does know, she has a funny way of showing it. I wouldn’t be excited to see my boyfriend’s ex of seven year, much less want her to be involved in my child’s life. How could he not tell her????? I mean the poor girl thinks the spare bedroom was my bedroom.  And what’s he been doing, just making up random things about my life. Vacation in New York? Really? Very funny, Alex. Depression, loss of love, loss of self-worth, loss of ambition, etc., etc. That’s definitely an ideal vacation right there.

Luckily I didn’t have to answer any of Penelope’s questions. The slamming of the front door told us both that Alex was home.

He has no idea how crazy I am about to go. If only TruPaul could see me now.

“Stella? I’m sorry I’m late. I just had to run to the market. Where are you?” Alex called from the living room.

Penelope waddled out of the room and down the hallway to meet him, and I was just one step behind her. Alex was obviously surprised to see Penelope. He very bluntly said, “What are you doing here, Penny? You said you were going shopping with your mother.”

“I wanted to meet Stella, Alex. When I called you earlier about picking up the ice cream for me I told you that we weren’t going to go until later this evening, remember?” Penelope said, sounding put-off with him.

“No, you didn’t tell me that. You just asked me to pick up the ice cream. You said you wouldn’t be home until eight,” Alex said, realizing what a huge mistake he’d made.

“It doesn’t matter, does it? I’m here, you’ve got the ice cream, I met Stella, and Stella is fabulous. She only just got here. I showed her what we’d done to her room—she said it looked great!” Penelope said, sounding overly enthusiastic.

“Right. Yeah. Umm, okay. Great. You two have met. That’s, that’s perfect,” Alex mumbled, obviously terrified that the two of us had put his puzzle of lies together. One of us had, for sure, but I wasn’t positive if Penelope has picked up on the scandal or not.

“Why don’t you guys catch up while I make a pot of tea?” Penelope said, walking away towards the kitchen.

Alex looked panicked to say the least. He was sweating, and his hands were visibly shaking. He gripped the arm of the sofa for support, and slowly sat down. I glared at him as I had never glared at him before.

“So, you’re ashamed of me, of the relationship we had, and she has no clue about anything that has to do with ‘us’, right?” I asked.

He said nothing.

“What does she think then? Who does she think I am? She obviously thinks we’re on good terms. I hear I’ve been to New York, eh? Was I supposed to bring you two back a present?” I was bombarding him with questions, but I didn’t care. He deserved it. I hadn’t expected this meeting to be easy, but I hadn’t expected... this either. I hadn’t expected anything like this at all. I didn’t deserve to be treated this way, to be lied to, lied about, and god knows what else.

He still stared, blank expression intact.

“You either answer my questions, or I’m going to ask her myself. You have until the count of three. One. Two. Thr—”

“She thinks we’re best friends, okay? How was I supposed to tell her? What was I supposed to tell her?” Alex stammered against his will.

“How about I make some cookies, guys? We can have the ice cream with it.” Penelope called from the kitchen.

“Sounds great,” Alex said.

Sounds just fucking great.