My stomach was a thousand different colors of anxious and excited. I absolutely loved a chance to dress up to the nines. I’m a show-off, I know, but for stiletto’s sake it was a ball! Isn’t that where all the magical stuff happened? Isn’t that where dreams came true? Isn’t that where Cinderella met Prince Charming? Speaking of Prince Charming, I’m not so sure how I feel about this date that Cassie has set up for me. I honestly think that she thinks that Alex will notice and be all awkward as exes are wont to do. If I think about it though, this is all TruPaul’s fault! I’m still not happy about her prancing into my office and taking over! Seriously, she’s stepping over her bounds a bit. I thought I was the one who was supposed to be figuring this out. I guess that I can thank her for giving me an excuse for wearing a killer dress. I’ve never really bought anything like it. Penelope will shrink like a violet, a fat violet.
It suddenly hit me that I needed to start getting ready at least three hours before I normally would because I have a little pit stop to make. My beauty routine on a night like this is rather rigorous. First of all a girl has to have a skin care routine. With the amount of skin that I was showing, my skin had to absolutely glow. It had to be glowing like a friggen Christmas tree. Pun, completely intended. After a glorious bath, I got a mani/pedi. I cannot stand it when people don’t have their toes done and they wear ridiculously expensive strappy heels. Quelle horreur! So after the exfoliation treatment like no other, and some extreme moisturizing, I was ready to continue the rest of my day getting ready.
I keep looking for TruPaul to appear in my closet looking at me with one eyebrow cocked. I couldn’t have been that lucky though. I was searching through my fabulous dream jewelry collection and I picked up a pair of insanely amazing earrings and then poof! they were gone! I whirl around and there that bitch is, putting them on. She was wearing some gold tragedy that I did not approve of. She clearly thought she looked like some angel or something. More like angel of doom… “Let me guess,” she said, “You have some crazy little scheme don’t you? Or you wouldn’t have started your beauty routine at three o’clock in the afternoon, would you?” I stood there trying to control my anger. I really wanted to stab her with my nail file. It would have been an expensive death. The nail file was from Tiffany’s. “First of all, where were you hiding that you knew I was getting ready? That’s crazy creepy!” I said through gritted teeth. “And second of all, what does it matter what I do?” I asked. Sometimes I was so aggravated with TruPaul. I thought she was a dream guide. I thought she was here to help. She just gives me vague instructions. It’s all mysterious and deep like, “You’re the key to the answer,” and stupid shit like that. Sometimes I think she thinks she’s scary smart like Dumbledore. Whatevs. Instead of getting on her diva pedestal, she just looks at me like I’m the one dressed like a holiday hooker. I turn around to find some suitable jewelry because honestly, the only thing I can think of is to ignore her. When I finally turn back around, she was gone as quietly as she came. Well, that was easy.
How did she know that I was planning on one last break in on Luna Avenue? It didn’t really matter. I had decided that I would do this one more time. I know it is ridiculously stupid. It is especially stupid considering the fact that I left the butter knife in the damn kitchen. I’m so glad that I don’t have to break into houses in my real life. I couldn’t handle wearing guy clothes everyday either. I mean seriously, flats and sneakers everyday?
All I know is that there is something in that house that I needed. The key to what I needed to know was in that house. If I had to tramp down Luna Avenue looking a little crazy because I was so dressed up for no apparent reason. The good thing about going tonight is that I won’t be in my car. Also, hopefully Alex and Penelope would have been at the ball long ago. I have to be fashionably late. I’m the CEO. I have to make people wait. It’s all a part of being in charge.
I applied my make-up super carefully. I am like a masterpiece! I slip into the sexy scarlet number and check my hair one last time. When I look into the mirror, I tell myself, “Stella, you can’t fuck this up.” I am resolute in what I have to do. This is the night. This is the night that I will figure everything out. This is the night that will change everything. For good or bad, I don’t really know.
I get a text from my driver. He’s ready. He’s not usually the guy that I go for, but I can’t have mouths running, now can I? I grab my little bag, look around the monastery to try and see if I’m forgetting anything. I have little butterflies dancing in my stomach. I lock the door behind me and face the night.
I glide into the limo and ask the driver to take me to the house on Luna Avenue. The driver doesn’t even give me a questionable glance and drives on smoothly towards the main road. By now people should be arriving. The doorman should be taking their jackets. Desperate housewives and miserable husbands should be downing champagne at a scandalous rate. Interns should be there sucking up to their superiors thinking this is a perfect opportunity to work their way upwards. In my mind’s eye I can see Alex escorting his whale, I meant woman. Her arm tucked in his. Do they even make whale sized ball gowns?
Never mind my bitter tirade. As if no time had passed we were at the house. Of course I march up to the house like I own the place, which I technically do. Anyways, I break in as smoothly as before. I look around to make sure no one is here even though the lights are all off. I turn just one light on to find my way around. I examine the kitchen and realize that the butter knife was put away. That made my heart stop. That meant that Alex knew someone had been here. That meant that he knew that it was me!
I calmed myself down and found my way to his office. My heels clicked on the expensive floor. “I must remember to put this much larger knife back in the kitchen that I just grabbed on the way in here,” I kept telling myself. Remember the details! I took the enormous cooking knife and found my way back to that locked bottom drawer. I wondered for a minute whether or not he had moved stuff, knowing that I had been in there. He’s so dumb though, he probably left everything there because he didn’t see any visible damage to the bottom drawer. Well, now there would be. It was kind of exciting to have this large, powerful, dangerous piece of metal in my hand. How awesome did I look, dressed like a goddess, but dangerous to the hilt! Oh if Alex could see me now! He quiver and cower and beg for my mercy! Oh how I’d love to see that!
I finally decided to open the drawer instead of contemplating my awesome. I stuck the knife behind lock and pried it open with all of my diva strength. Nothing happened at first. That was rather disappointing as I had been working out like a beast with my personal trainer. After a few more pries and me stabbing the shit out of the super expensive desk, oops, the damned thing finally opened. What I found inside was not what I was expecting.
I thought that I would find some time line of Alex’s betrayal. Instead, all I found was a lonely, cheap, ugly, probably from Office Max, generic, journal. He could at least have gone to Barnes and Noble and bought a really nice faux leather journal. After all that would be a green way to go right? I would never put my deepest thoughts, desires and emotions on something so gross!
When I flipped through the pages of journal, I quickly discovered that it did not contain what I thought it would. Instead, stuck between the pages were letters. They were correspondences between Alex and Tom! I read them like a ravenous Perez Hilton. The more I read, the more confused I got. The letters to me were extremely grave. The most I got out of them was that Tom approved the fake request for all of my files to be deleted. I was livid now! Two people I was supposed to have trusted went behind my back and destroyed the work of my company. Then Alex destroyed my life. Oh I had to get revenge on both of them. This was not going to be pretty!
I marched my hot ass back to the limo. It’s on! That party better be ready for Stella. I’m so glad that Cassie convinced me to wear this scandalous dress. Those people won’t know what hit them, especially Alex and his cow. Once back in the limo, I did a make-up check. I was ready!
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